The Curated Weekend | What’s Worth Bringing Home?

There are some mornings when I wake up ready to get going.

And then there are mornings when my brain seems to have about twelve tabs open before I’ve even finished my coffee.

On those mornings, I’ve learned not to immediately add more noise.

I make my coffee, put on some grounding music, and pull a card from an oracle deck I keep nearby. Nothing complicated. Just a few minutes to settle in before I start answering emails, checking my phone, and thinking about everything I need to get done.

This morning, sitting at my desk with a cup of Bulletproof coffee and the lingering scent of sage and palo santo in the room, I felt unusually content.

It’s the first week of September—my birthday month—and that surprised me a little.

I’ve written before about how September can bring on a bit of dread for me. Summer ending. Allergies. Routines starting up again. And then there’s my birthday. I’m not really a Birthday Person. All the attention and expectation around one day has never been my favorite thing.

Which is perhaps funny because I am a pretty classic Virgo in other ways. Give me a list, a plan and a little order and I’m happy. But I also need peace. I’m an extrovert who genuinely loves people, but I equally love time to myself. This week somehow gave me a little of both.

Labor Day weekend was spent at the beach with old friends. Long walks, conversation, nowhere we really needed to be. I came home feeling full in the best possible way.

Then yesterday, another good friend and I went thrifting in San Jose.

Naturally, I had a plan.

A Day of Treasure Hunting

Five stores, mapped in order. Two I’d been to before, three were new to me and all five were new to her.

Was five ambitious? Probably.

But I’m an optimist.

Between retro signs, racks of clothes, fabulous vintage mannequins and things neither of us could quite imagine anyone ever buying… Moon Zoom was like stepping into a wonderfully crazy time capsule.

We stopped for lunch at Falafel Drive-In, a San Jose institution I’ve been coming to since my college days. We grabbed our falafel, found a spot at one of the outdoor picnic tables, and joined the other die-hard fans who clearly know a good thing when they find it.

Then there was the Goodwill Loft on West San Carlos Street—an upstairs space that’s easy to miss and feels a little like a secret once you know it’s there.

And that’s where I found one of my favorite treasures of the day: an All Saints ‘Balfern’ leather moto jacket in washed grey, in amazing condition for $28.

The same jacket in black is currently selling at Nordstrom for around $600.

Now that I could see myself wearing.

But it was at Crossroads Trading that my intentional-shopping experiment really got tested.

Fantasy Life vs. Real Life

First, I found the shoes.

Full-on dopamine rush.

Brown. Beaded. A little outrageous. Completely fabulous.

And $40.

For a moment, $40 made the fantasy seem entirely reasonable.

Surely there was some future dinner, party, vacation, or wonderfully glamorous version of my everyday life waiting for these shoes.

Except there wasn’t.

I loved looking at them. I loved trying them on.

I did not need to bring them home.

Then I picked up a cozy long green boucle cardigan.

My friend looked at it and said:

“Throw that on and meet me for coffee.”

There it was.

Real life.

Coffee with a friend. Working at my desk. Something I could toss over jeans or a pair of comfy wide-leg knit pants—even pajama pants—when I want another layer.

In fact, I’m wearing it right now as I sit in my air-conditioned home office writing this.

The shoes stayed behind.

The cardigan came home.

And that may have been my favorite find of the day.

Not because it was the most exciting thing I saw, but because I could immediately see it becoming part of my life.

Sometimes the best question isn’t: Do I love it?

It’s: Can I see myself living in it?

A Little Intention Before the Treasure Hunt

Before we went shopping, I had pulled out my fall purgatory bins and gone through the pieces I’d set aside last year.

I made a pile to sell, reacquainted myself with the clothes I’ll eventually be wearing again, and paid attention to the things I repeatedly don’t wear.

Then I filled out the Intentional Shopping List I shared here last week.

Not just what I wanted. What works for me. What I already have enough of. And, perhaps most importantly, what I should stop buying.

Having that list with me kept me from falling into the thrift-store trap of, “but it’s such a good deal.”

Apparently, even a treasure hunt benefits from a little Virgo preparation.

Tap (here) to download my blank printable and start your own list.

After a day spent looking through racks of clothes and shelves of things, it was funny what caught my attention early the next morning.

Lavender.

I passed this front garden on my early morning walk and stopped to take a photo.

Maybe that’s why I smiled when I sat down later and pulled a card from The Herbal Astrology Pocket Oracle.

Lavender.

Of all the cards.

Lavender has long been one of my favorite flowers, and according to the deck, it’s connected with Virgo and Mercury.

I had to laugh.

Maybe it’s a coincidence. Maybe it’s simply one of those little things we notice because we’re paying attention.

Either way, it felt just right this morning.

I think that’s also one reason I keep returning to Earthbound Farm whenever we’re in Carmel. I like seeing what has changed since the last time I was there.

One visit it’s lavender. Another time it’s herbs and summer flowers. I’m heading back to Carmel this weekend, and I have a feeling the lavender I photographed on my last visit may have been replaced by pumpkins.

Around here, sometimes you have to look a little harder for the seasons to change.

And sometimes you simply have to notice.

Last weekend ended with friends at the beach.

As the sun got lower, a few people were still walking along the water, dogs were running on the sand, and everyone seemed to linger just a little longer before heading in.

I took this photo from the stairs of their deck.

For a few minutes, there was nowhere else I needed to be.

This Week’s Reflection

I’m sitting here writing this in the green cardigan I brought home from our thrift-shopping day.

The fabulous $40 shoes are still at Crossroads—unless someone else has already decided they belong in her life.

And I think I’m okay with that.

I’ve spent a lot of time over the years thinking and writing about what makes something worth buying. Quality. Fit. Price. Whether it works with what I already own.

All good questions.

But lately, I find myself wanting to do more than simply talk about intentional shopping. I want to actually live by the question I keep coming back to:

Does this belong in the life I’m actually living?

Maybe that’s a useful question beyond our closets, too.

Some things deserve to come home with us. Some are fun simply to discover. And some of the best things—the lavender on a morning walk, coffee with a friend, an evening at the beach—were never ours to keep in the first place.

Until next weekend,